The same as any human communication. building a healthy family relationship is a process, and laborious and sometimes difficult, but the most important is continuous. If up to a certain stage in your relationship developed by themselves, without apparent effort of the partners, do not think that with the establishment of the family all continues in the same vein. Unfortunately, there are many sad examples of the effect of the passive way of building relationships. Moving in together, getting married, having kids – all major steps in the life of both partners, but behind them are millions of small steps, through which you can create and maintain for years of healthy family relationships.
There are basic rules of healthy families, exploring and applying that in practice, you will see significant changes for the better, will discover new facets of family relationships and realize that a family can turn into an amazing journey of a lifetime. Let us rather look at them!
1: family relations should be distance
It would seem that people create a family in order to become one, to open up to each other and to accept your partner the way he is. Yes, it looks like true love. but unfortunately, very few people know how to love and to be loved want. Therefore, such a complete convergence pushes the novelty and ease of relationships drop by drop. Then many couples begin to monitor each step of each other, to ask and tell about everything that happened during the day spent in conflict. The desire to control everything and never to be separated originates in the inner fears and problems, which affected almost everyone. Instead of filling with a partner their own emptiness and to merge with him into one whole, you should leave space between you.
Get the pleasure of communicating and living together, and not knowing about each other not telling how spent every minute of the day away from each other. The basis of healthy family relationships – the personal space of each of its members. This should not necessarily be interpreted as separate leisure (though it is also very desirable) and their friends/girlfriends each partner, it may mean simply freedom. The freedom that he has to go where he wants, without asking permission and not receiving a response to negative emotions. and exactly the same freedom to do something just because I want to do something for her.
If a person always feels that the family can be themselves, share any thoughts, and Express themselves the way he wants to Express his opinion, etc. it is a healthy family. However, it should not turn into a discussion circle in which each hoarse proves his innocence. If you feel the freedom to be yourself just as you are taking the right partner to be themselves and understand that your opinions do not have to match each occasion. For family relations to be successful, you need to learn to compromise and come to a compromise, but don’t confuse it with the adjustment to the opinion of the partner to continue to love you and remained in the family – such an approach is doomed to failure.
Spiritual development and growth in the family can occur in three Parallels, and that’s fine. First, developing each of the partners is on his way, and, secondly, they develop both as a couple inside a relationship. It is important not to look at other families, not to try on their views and values. if your different. Because each person and therefore each family is unique and to depend on someone else-means to lose their unique “I” or “we”.
3: Enjoy the process
Family relationships – it’s not a race in which final you will get a prize called “happy old age” or “good kids”, it is a process that can and should enjoy. The reward for you will have many enjoyable moments and joyful feelings, not created artificially, for example, on the occasion of the anniversary, and naturally occurring in a healthy family. In addition to the point about the distance, I want to say that the secret of a healthy relationship is very simple: never believe that you got your partner.
Don’t think of it as the property or available as a matter of course, every day conquer a loved one again – no big words and vivid gestures, and respectful attitude, sincere support and love interesting conversation. If you want to interest in family relations have remained throughout the years, know that to maintain it – your task and that of your partner.